He Doesn't Leave Me {Sabbath Bread}

Some Red Letters for your Sabbath today.

They didn’t know he was speaking about his Father. So Jesus said to them, “When the Human One is lifted up, then you will know that I Am. Then you will know that I do nothing on my own, but I say just what the Father has taught me.  He who sent me is with me. He doesn’t leave me by myself, because I always do what makes him happy.” While Jesus was saying these things, many people came to believe in him. -John 8:27-30 (CEB)

Oh Lord,we choose to trust Your unfailing, divine, everlasting love more than our fears. Thank You for never leaving us alone, though at times it does feel lonely here. Now. In this. You speak truth, Jesus, truth from the Father on human lips that once kissed Your mother and once kissed Judas too. Because You became a person we could see and hear, we now know who the Father is, and the truth of salvation by Your grace. Make me more like you, Jesus - I want to do what makes the Father happy too. Thank You for being with me, Spirit, and for carrying me when I'm weak. Thank You for making me strong to say what You have taught me. I choose to lift You high in my life, and dedicate my attention to learning how to do that even better. May You be honored today. And every day. Until That Day when You come back to rescue us. So let it be. 

photo credit: Vishal Patel via flickr creative commons

Five Minute Friday {change}

Good Afternoon, my Lovelies!

We made it together to the end of another work week, and now it's time for some writing before we start the week-end fun!

If you're new to the #fmfparty, check out all of the details here and get those fingers typing and linking up with Kate.

This week's prompt is CHANGE. No editing. Just writing. Five minutes.

GO

People change, days change, routines change. Lives change.

Soft baby skin becomes rough and wrinkled by years and tears and sunshine. My skin has changed in recent years, to my chagrin.

Funny how the measure of change is always a source of my complaining. I'm sure He wonders if I'll ever be content. "I need something different - I'm so bored with this same old life!" has become, "Oh, please, just let me settle down for a minute. Too much change, too much adventure, too much unknown!"

Really, Robyn? Get a grip.

But grips don't come if I keep these hands clenched around a facade of control. Hands have to open, change must come, adaptation will happen.

Change is the power verb in the serenity prayer, and I suppose I agree that some things can change and others cannot. I don't always get to decide.

Which is fine, because I'm no good at being sovereign, anyway.

Change me, Lord as I crave or reject the change that ebbs and flows all around. Make me more like Your Son. That kind of change is what I'm really after. Whatever it takes, however long. You're worth it. You are Worthy. 

STOP

Happy writing, Friends. And Happy Friday #fmfparty!!

photo credit: Nigel Wedge via flickr Creative Commons

When You Feel Hopelessness and Doom {Sabbath Bread}

"The Spirit of God, the Master, is on me
    because God anointed me.
He sent me to preach good news to the poor,
    heal the heartbroken,
Announce freedom to all captives,
    pardon all prisoners.
God sent me to announce the year of his grace—
    a celebration of God’s destruction of our enemies—
    and to comfort all who mourn,
To care for the needs of all who mourn in Zion,
    give them bouquets of roses instead of ashes,
Messages of joy instead of news of doom,
    a praising heart instead of a languid spirit."  
                      -Isaiah 61:1-3 (Msg)






O God, what can we say to this love that draws us to Your Son with irresistible magnetism? Nothing can separate us from this love that rescues us from our prison cells and darkest pits. When all hope is lost, You pursue us and announce Your love that brings joy and freedom. Deliver our hearts today - from every scheme and trap the devil deceives us into thinking we're stuck in hopelessly. Thank You for this restoration You offer me every day - You redeem me from the evil of this world, the attack of my enemy, the despair of my circumstances, and the sorrow of death and loss. We need your beauty to replace these ashes, Lord. Only Your love can restore our hope.

photo credit: Terry Foote via flickr creative commons

Belong {Five Minute Friday}

On Fridays we write together and I'm linking up today with Crystal on behalf of Lisa, and so can you by clicking here.

Our word prompt this week is Belong.

GO!

Transition is a thief of belonging.

As I stand (okay, I'm actually sitting right now, work with me) I don't have a permanent residence and although my family all have beds and a roof right now, I'm sure some might consider us homeless. All of our stuff is sardine-packed into the garage of a place we own but no longer inhabit. We finished a two-week painting project on another house we don't live in yesterday, and return to the home-away-from-home we have here at my in-laws'. We're always welcome here and I'm thankful, but the back of my mind reminds me again that as good as this feels, it's only temporary. We're not settled yet.

(that's my Guy there on the top of the roof; and that's my heart pounding, my soul praying he won't fall there behind the lens)

Looking ahead I know God will plant us again in a new garden, but seeds blowing in the wind must take captive fluttering anxieties every moment if they want to abide intact and have any grain worth pushing down into the soil. Transition breeds unrest, worry, and anxiety faster than rabbits. And I know that I don't want to worry but worry finds me out. I wasn't playing hide and seek with it. Seriously - leave me alone already.

When I wonder where I belong on this earth, there's an answer. I'll always have a place with this guy.

He's the gift I didn't know I needed, but Someone gave him to me 18 years ago, anyway, and it seems so strange that I've known him now longer that I haven't. Who knew that little ignorant girl would find all the belonging her flailing heart needed in him, and that for decades he would calm all of her flutters in the strength of his arms and the clarity of his eyes, the flash of his smile? Her Maker knew, knew how much she would need to belong to someone. 

I still sign notes to him this way: fyg. Forever Your Girl. And when I don't belong anywhere I still belong to him. His love still amazes me. The way he still only has eyes for me. That's rare, you know. Even last night as I drifted off, I was struck by how he still looks at me. Still wants me. Still turns his eyes from other prettier things back to my eyes. Still offers me treasures like strength, time, kisses, devotion, words, balance, dreams, and hands.

I don't know where I'll be sleeping next month, or cooking or working or going to church - those kinds of things offer belonging. But I do know that whatever may come, my hand will be in his. And even though my citizenship is of a different Place, I will always belong with him.

"My steps have held fast to your paths;
    my feet have not slipped." -Psalm 17:5 (ESV)

STOP

Your turn!

To write with a community and find belonging for your words, click here. And keep writing!

Fear or Security - You Choose {Sabbath Bread}

Yes, the sky really is this blue here. It's a "fluffy cloud day," as my friend Renae fondly refers to them. 

"And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free. ... I tell you the truth, everyone who sins is a slave of sin. A slave is not a permanent member of the family, but a son is part of the family forever. So if the Son sets you free, you are truly free." -John 8:32, 34-36 (NLT)

"... regardless of what may come our way, God's people are safe. Let the solid earth shake and let the skies be torn in row, yet even amid the destruction of the world, believers remain as secure as they are during their calmest times of rest. And if the Lord does not save His people under heaven, He will save them in heaven... Stand upon His promises, rest in His faithfulness, and you can defy even the darkest future, for nothing can harm you. Your only concern should be to exhibit to the world the blessedness of obeying the Voice of wisdom." -Spurgeon 

"He will shield you with his wings! They will shelter you. His faithful promises are your armor." - Psalm 91:4 (TLB)

Oh God, Your love amazes me again today and I'm humbled to repentance as I recall lists of fears where I should have stood on Your faithful promises as my armor. This fear that strangles, this worry that creeps - oh how I hate how my enemy infiltrates my mind with illusion and doubt. Jesus, You died to set me free from the sin of fear, the trap of fear, and the illusion of fear, and I have no business living in the prison cell for even another moment. If I do, it is not Your fault, but my choice. Perhaps my thinking is ignorant or deceived or foolish. Or perhaps mere forgetfulness is to blame. But no - not today. Today I remind my soul and preach to my heart of Your faithful track record. You have never failed me and You won't. Today I refuse fear and I deliberately choose to receive with open hands the freedom You have paid for so dearly to emancipate this mind from terror. Please reveal to me any illusions of fear the devil has pulled over my eyes and wake me up to Your peace and security. Thank You for this freedom. 

It's the Little Things {Thankful on Thursday}

If you've been with me for a while, you know the drill. We choose gratitude together every day and help each other see the gifts with eyes looking at the Giver. On Thursdays I we share a few of these gifts here. And if you're new here in the nest, I should tell you that choosing joy and a life of thanksgiving was a turning point for me when I was in a really bad way a few years ago. A friend gave me a book that I now recommend to everyone I can about giving thanks and, well, you really just have to try it. 

One important thing to share with my new readers is that I count these gifts, like counting the ways He loves me. 

I had recently spent three weeks of the summer away from my children (the longest yet) while they were living it up with the grandparents. There may or may not have been excessive ice cream and chocolate involved. I'll never know. But when K caught a glimpse of my gratitude journal among my book stack, she asked, "Have you gotten to 5,000 yet?" At first I had no clue what she was talking about. Five thousand times I've agonized over this transition? Five thousand times I've wished God would just go ahead and hurry up already? Five thousand words I've shouted at Daddy because I'm tense and he's the closest thing I have to a scapegoat? Five thousand reasons I hate packing? "Five thousand what, honey?" I finally ask.

"Five thousand gifts, Mama." 

Oh, that. "Let's see - nope, not quite. But almost."

Leave it to my tween to bring me down to earth. Back to sanity.

Because gratitude is the door to joy and joy is the antidote to all this insanity surrounding me.

So, without further ado - a few gifts from my list. But, please - don't just read mine - add your own too in the comments below. Let's encourage one another's hearts as we point with hands full of gifts to the Giver who is so generous. 

- generous love offering from T&C, neighbors who love with words and deeds

- a delicious burger at a new restaurant, and fun birthday celebration with family

- giving baby B her bottle, and sweet wrinkle-nose faces

- news from afar, and the amazing way You sustain my heart afloat with hope

- deep riches, promises, love found in Isaiah 43 - every delicious morsel of Your word

- PL's sermon about bitterness, and his challenge to forgive rather than sit in a "hot-tub full of pus" [no lie - that was his analogy!]

- getting to meet interesting people with astonishing testimonies at a church picnic

- laughing with J about the "dirty rotten bird" who had the audacity to sing outside his window and wake him up

- "A person cannot receive even one thing unless it is given him from heaven." -John 3:27

- long talks with old friends

Lord, thank You for all of this and so much more. Thank You for Your generosity, and for giving me everything I have, tangible and not. You love me far more than I deserve and if I could give it all back to honor You, I would. For now I have this - Thank You. Let it be enough.

“Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.” ― Epicurus

A Bit of a Ramble, If I May {Follow}

Missing these guys,

I pack boxes under duress, stress going right in with the dishes and books and baskets and lamps and the how-am-I-ever-gonna-get-that-in-a-box paintings. My guy hunches over heavy decisions and yes, *blush*, there may or may not have been some shouting this week. Transition brings out our differences like a hammer-knocked thumb and oh my, are we so very different ... Transition brings out hope too, though, and I have a fair portion of that lately also. Above all, this I learn - transition refines the follower in me.

Following with excellence boils down to trust. Boiling cauldrons full of stressful choices large and small characterize transition, and all this bubbling, pounding becomes a repeating echo He asks again: "Will you trust Me?"

If I answer yes, I know what He'll say next.

"Then follow Me."

Which boils down to humility. As much control as I'd wield if I could for my own facade of comfort, I would. But what then? I wouldn't be following, I'd be rebelling. And I'm left with one choice. Surrender. Again. 

Because I'm no good at being sovereign, but I do know the One who is.

Yesterday the verse leaped off thin pages and landed in my soul like an anchor.

“No chance at all,” Jesus said, “if you think you can pull it off by yourself. Every chance in the world if you trust God to do it.” - Luke 18:27 (Msg) [emphasis mine]

I'm loving these bold lines He draws with me. I haven't always - loved them, that is. Today I devour them like candy. Try it on your own, fail every time; trust Me and follow Me, it's guaranteed. 

And what choice do I have? 

This humbling passage rolls through my recesses today:

“Welcome, Prince,” said Aslan. “Do you feel yourself sufficient to take up the Kingship of Narnia?”“I—I don’t think I do, Sir,” said Caspian. “I’m only a kid.”
“Good,” said Aslan. “If you had felt yourself sufficient, it would have been a proof that you were not. Therefore, under us and under the High King, you shall be King of Narnia..." - C.S. Lewis, Prince Caspian

If I'm to follow Him, I must trust Him to do it - every part. I am merely the one cooperating, receiving, walking in the paths He paves with holy Feet. He's readying them for my gospel-shod soles too.  

Is following Jesus easy? Hardly. Is there any other way? Not for me.

Everything You Have Promised {Sabbath Bread}

"Even though you are so high above,

  you care for the lowly,

    and the proud cannot hide from you.

When I am surrounded by troubles

you keep me safe.

You oppose my angry enemies

    and save me by your power.

You will do everything you have promised;

    Lord, your love is eternal.

    Complete the work that you have begun."

-Psalm 138:6-8 (GNT)

Oh God, today I am reminded once again of your Sovereign power and control over the circumstances of my life. I am so impatient sometimes, so demanding, so anxious for control. Surrounded by troubles and enemies and then ... Your peace flowing to overflowing, making every empty striving void full of the calm only You offer. And how could I ask for more. May this awakening of Your faithfulness and every kept promise make me alive like never before. Alive in You by Your grace. Let Your glory invade me until I wake up to Your peace. Finish this work you've started until I spill over with Your goodness. 

The Value of Faithful

Massive monuments start as small stones. Lifetimes are built from moments, and organizations are a million common actions in the same direction. A teaspoon of faithfulness seasons a whole batch of character.

God refers to Himself as Faithful. It's an adjective the Almighty uses to describe His Divine Being to mortals.

"The Lord passed in front of Moses, calling out, 'Yahweh! The Lord! The God of compassion and mercy! I am slow to anger and filled with unfailing love and faithfulness.' " - Exodus 34:6 (NLT) [emphasis mine]

I'll never forget the question my mother asked me when I was old enough to choose God. "How do you know God is real?" I didn't know how to answer, so she helped me. "He does what He says. What He promises in the Bible - it comes true, both in history, and in your life." I don't know if she realized in that moment how her words would change me.

His faithfulness proves His existence, even proves His love.

Can that be said of me, His follower? While I won't be perfect, and neither will you, Dear One, we are being conformed to His likeness. Our faithfulness will grow. More of what we promise will come to pass, the more we surrender to His power to change us. And this is what we follow, this is who we become - Faithful.

Have you committed to something in zeal without counting the cost?

Have you backed out on a commitment or a relationship God wanted you to see through?

Have you made excuses instead of making promises; instead of keeping them?

Have you gone right when the voice in your heart said to go left?

Have you said the words you swore you'd never say?

Have you left untended the dream you promised your heart you'd achieve?

Believe me, I'm preaching this to my soul too first, Reader. Getting my plank out before I look for your splinter. I've failed at faithfulness more times than I care to count, but this: progress. I press on. I pursue His likeness. I cooperate with His molding. I desire to reflect Him. It starts small and builds, it grows. This snowball of faithfulness rolling toward avalanches. 

What faithful steps can we take today that will emulate our Lord Jesus, and what bricks can we lay on the foundation of our lives that will speak to all, "I have done what I set out to do"?

Sabbath Bread {Content with Calvary}

"And when they had come to the place called Calvary, there they crucified Him, and the criminals, one on the right hand and the other on the left."

-Luke 23:33 (NKJV)

"I have learned how to be content with whatever I have."

- Philippians 4:11 (NLT)

"Often the bitter herbs of Gethsemane have taken away the bitterness of your life, the scourge of Gabbatha often has scourged away your worries, and the groans of Golgotha have produced unthinkably rich comfort for you. We would never have known the full height and depth of Christ's love if He had not died, nor would we  have even been able to guess of the Father's deep affection if He had not given His Son to die." -Charles Spurgeon

Lord, I have You. Your ransom of my soul is what You wanted to give me. I want to learn like Paul did, the secret of contentment, of joy - wanting nothing more than my Sovereign King gives me. Wanting what I have and letting it be enough. Calvary - Your brutal death and abundant bloodshed to pay for my forever with You - is enough. It covers not only my failures, but all I could ever desire.

Sabbath Bread {A Long Drink of Salvation}

“If you’ll hold on to me for dear life,” says God,

    “I’ll get you out of any trouble.

I’ll give you the best of care

    if you’ll only get to know and trust me.

Call me and I’ll answer, be at your side in bad times;

    I’ll rescue you, then throw you a party.

I’ll give you a long life,

    give you a long drink of salvation!”

-Psalm 91:14-16 (Msg)

Oh, Jesus - I know my part. 
Hold onto You with desperate abandon,
get to know and trust you while I'm here on this planet, 
and call out to You when I get into trouble. 
If I'll do those things, 
You'll get me out of every mess, 
bring me into Your promise, 
and satisfy my thirst for more than this flesh can contain. 
I am truly undeserving of a Love this abundant, 
yet I open my hands to as much of it as I can hold. 

Thank you Lord. 

Live or die?

“Today I have given you the choice between life and death, between blessings and curses. Now I call on heaven and earth to witness the choice you make. Oh, that you would choose life, so that you and your descendants might live! You can make this choice by loving the Lord your God, obeying him, and committing yourself firmly to him. This is the key to your life." 

-Deuteronomy 30:19-20a (NLT) 

The pastor's in the pulpit and his hands wave and dance with his words. He tells us to die, and says he's giving up himself for lent; invites me to do the same. 

Die to this flesh and its endless desires, lusts, prides. Increasing Jesus and decreasing me. 

"This world tells you that you need to 'find yourself.' Well, I did find myself and you know what I found? Yuck!"  Even as he says it, I can't believe it of him, but I know it's true of me. Yes, I've been on a search for me - the real me - and when I found her it was far from what I'd hoped. That woman, that me, she's nothing without her Rescuer. 

This life isn't about soul-searching as much as it's about God-searching. Seek Christ and you seek life. Find Him and you find it all. Forget to knock on His door, and emptiness will be the least of your worries. 

To lay down self and take up crosses - everything worth doing is difficult. 

A teacher at my workplace says it and I know it's true of following Christ too - "If this was easy, everyone would do it, right?"

The pastor goes on about carrying a cross and I'm breathless again with this one - "We're called to carry crosses, not guillotines." We can't crucify our flesh with one quick motion, like a guillotine. Crucifixion was a slow, public, humiliating, painful, lengthy death, that often took days to complete. And this Daily Cross is a process - a painful, long parting with flesh that has no destination short of heaven. Only then will we be glorified in perfection-life. Oh glorious hope!

Then, calling the crowd to join his disciples, he said, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross, and follow Me. If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake and for the sake of the Good News, you will save it. 

-Mark 8:34-35 (NLT)

Sometimes choosing life means deciding to die.

It's hard eucharisteo to be thankful for the privilege of suffering, of dying with Him, but I'm okay with trying hard things. I can be thankful, even for this, because I know obedience is worth it. He is worth it. I know I've failed before, and I'll probably hold on to too much of myself again - but it's in the not giving up where I think He's pleased with His kids. So will you pray this with me too, Dear One?

Lord, please show me the parts of my life that need to be crucified today for Your glory and my good. Give me the strength and endurance required today to lay down my selfish desires and take up my cross for Your Kingdom. Please heal my heart even as I die a little every day, and revive me in Your presence with joy. Show me what You desire of me, and how to obey You more. Make my life a living sacrifice of love to You. You are worth it - worth the pain and every ounce of suffering. I need no other motivation than Your love. 

Quotes from Pastor Lance Lecocq with permission

Sabbath Bread {believe His promises}

All your waves and billows have gone over me, and floods of sorrow pour upon me like a thundering cataract.

Yet day by day the Lord also pours out his steadfast love upon me, and through the night I sing his songs and pray to God who gives me life.

“O God my Rock,” I cry, “why have You forsaken me? 

Why must I suffer these attacks from my enemies?” 

Their taunts pierce me like a fatal wound; again and again they scoff, 

“Where is that God of yours?” 

But, O my soul, don’t be discouraged. Don’t be upset. 

Expect God to act! For I know that I shall again have plenty of reason to praise Him for all that He will do. 

He is my help! He is my God!

-Psalm 42:7-11 (TLB)

"Be bold and believe, 'because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you"' Through this promise the Lord gives His people everything ... there is nothing you could want, nothing you could ask for, nothing you could need in all of time or eternity, nothing living or dying, nothing in this world or the next, and nothing now, nothing on resurrection morning, or nothing in heaven that is not contained in in this verse - 'Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.' " (Deut. 31:6)  - Charles Spurgeon 

 Oh God - You alone are the crux, the epitome. You are Everything we thirst for, Everything we need and want - always. Sometimes we think we need things like comfort or power or satisfaction or belongings or fame - but we are wrong. Sometimes we believe our forsaken feelings instead of believing Your promises not to ever forsake us. Forgive our sin of unbelief, Lord. We repent and choose to believe Your promises to satisfy our longings with Yourself. With Your Spirit. With Your Son. All we need is found in Your presence, and had we nothing save You - we would be satiated. You are just that wonderful. Let us put all else aside today as we pursue Your heart, and let Your glory fill every void in our lives today. There is none besides You, Jesus. 

Sabbath Bread {desire}

"Trust in the Lord and do good.
    Then you will live safely in the land and prosper.

Take delight in the Lord,
    and He will give you your heart’s desires.

 Commit everything you do to the Lord.
    Trust him, and he will help you.
 He will make your innocence radiate like the dawn,
    and the justice of your cause will shine like the noonday sun.

 Be still in the presence of the Lord,
    and wait patiently for him to act.
Don’t worry about evil people who prosper
    or fret about their wicked schemes."

                        -Psalm 37:3-7 (NLT) [emphasis mine]

Father - we are hungry for Your will, and our food is to do it. We wait for You to act, and choose not to worry when wickedness seems to prosper all around us. What we want most is what You want to give us, the desires of our hearts both planted and fulfilled by Your sovereign hand. Today once again we choose to trust You, doing the hard work trust requires - the hard work of opening our hands and releasing the control. Be it waves, flames, or river's current - we will brave it all with Your help that we may get to You. 

Sabbath Bread {daily expect this}

"Since everything here today might well be gone tomorrow, do you see how essential it is to live a holy life? Daily expect the Day of God, eager for its arrival. The galaxies will burn up and the elements melt down that day—but we’ll hardly notice. We’ll be looking the other way, ready for the promised new heavens and the promised new earth, all landscaped with righteousness." 

- 2 Peter 3:11-13 (The Message)

Lord, thank You for this hope. You might come today, Jesus - and I want You to make me ready in every way to see You. Refine me, Father. Fill my soul afresh with this glorious hope and perspective. This could be the day you open the heavens and lift us out of this wreckage into the hope of the aftermath. All I am hinges on this hope - today could be the day I see Your face. 

Sabbath Bread {Where He lives}

For this is what the high and exalted One says—
    He who lives forever, whose name is holy:
“I live in a high and holy place,
    but also with the one who is contrite and lowly in spirit,
to revive the spirit of the lowly
    and to revive the heart of the contrite.
 I will not accuse them forever,
    nor will I always be angry,
for then they would faint away because of Me—
    the very people I have created.

I was enraged by their sinful greed;
    I punished them, and hid My face in anger,
    yet they kept on in their willful ways.
 I have seen their ways, but I will heal them;
    I will guide them and restore comfort to Israel’s mourners,

    creating praise on their lips.
Peace, peace, to those far and near,”
    says the Lord. “And I will heal them.”

-Isaiah 57:16-19 (NIV)

[emphasis added]

Thank You, Father, for your patient grace. I praise You because You live not only in the heavens, but also with each person who is broken, humble, contrite, and mourning over his or her sin. Though I have fallen into sinful ruins many times in my life, You are always there the meet my heart when I humble it before you, turning Your wrath to comfort and my ruins to glory. You amaze me, Father. Your mercy is amazing.

photo credit: Rebekah Ceol