a little bird told me ... {about friendship}

My apologies for not posting this on Saturday - technological difficulties and busy conference schedule. Thank you for grace.

Dear Robyn,

What makes for a great friend? I want to be a great friend, not just friendly. How do you choose friends for yourself? What is good to give and take? 

Dear Not Just Friendly,

What great questions! First of all, I want to say your desires are so valid - we all want to be givers in relationships, and not just takers. And choosing your friends is one of the most important decisions you can make. Let's take them one at a time, and see where we get, alright? {I'm writing mostly about friends of the feminine variety here, but just about all of the principles are valid across the board to guys too.}

Great friends are true and unconditional.  

   "A friend is always loyal" -Proverbs 17:17 (NLT)

They are brave enough to say it like it is - but gently. 

   "we will speak the truth in love" -Ephesians 4:15 (NLT)

They make promises of selfless love to one another, and keep them. 

   "And Jonathan made David reaffirm his vow of friendship again, for Jonathan loved David as he loved himself." - 1 Samuel 20:17 (NLT)

They speak good of each other, and never bad. 

   "They have told the church here of your loving friendship." -3 John 1:6 (NLT)

They pour good into each other and refuse to gossip or listen to gossip. This is how they honor God and each other's dignity.

   "Lord, who may enter your Holy Tent? Who may live on your holy mountain?  Only those who are innocent   and who do what is right. Such people speak the truth from their hearts and do not tell lies about others. They do no wrong to their neighbor and do not gossip." -Psalm 15:1-3 (NCV)

They accept one another's troubles and baggage, and make a safe place for each other's pain. 

   "By helping each other with your troubles, you truly obey the law of Christ."- Galatians 6:2 (NCV)
They refuse to let insecurity and comparison make fools and enemies of each other. 
   "She is clothed with strength and dignity" - Proverbs 31:25a (NIV)
They laugh at themselves and each other, and don't take one another too seriously. 
   "she can laugh at the days to come." -Proverbs 31:25b (NIV)

When I choose my friends I have learned (the hard way) to look for a few key signals:
1. Does she help me keep my priorities, or is she trying to take the place of my God, my husband, or my family? If she can be comfortable with her place and role in my life, I can begin to let her into my heart.
2. Does she talk about others negatively to me? If a friend is willing to gossip to you, she'll be willing to gossip about you
3. Does she point me back to Jesus and back to my husband when I'm discouraged? If someone tries too hard to carry too much of my load, or expect the reverse of me, I know that can never work. We can help each other without killing each other. 

As far as give and take, each relationship is unique, but overall I believe we can always aim to err on the side of love and grace. A little humility goes a long way. Lead with your ears and learn to be a good listener - this skill only comes in the practicing. Be generous with forgiveness, and know you'll need to receive healthy portions of it too. Hope is often the best gift, and joy is always better when shared. Give verses of encouragement from God's Word, and pray for each other fervently. Give your tears and your shoulder, and open your hands to the special ways your friend loves you. Find common interests and celebrate each other's differences. 

I love these verses when it comes to friendships:

So, chosen by God for this new life of love, dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you: compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline. Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It’s your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it. Let the peace of Christ keep you in tune with each other, in step with each other. None of this going off and doing your own thing. And cultivate thankfulness. Let the Word of Christ—the Message—have the run of the house. Give it plenty of room in your lives. Instruct and direct one another using good common sense. And sing, sing your hearts out to God! Let every detail in your lives—words, actions, whatever—be done in the name of the Master, Jesus, thanking God the Father every step of the way." - Colossians 3:12-17 (Msg)

I hope that helps, and I pray that Jesus will bless you with many beautiful friendships. 

Thank you for asking,

Robyn

I Hope This Disturbs You ... But That's Not Enough

As promised, I'm writing to you, Cherished Reader - to offer my pulsing heart on a platter in hopes that this love will land in you. By now it's no secret:

Precious people are being bought and sold like a commodity, and if our generation continues to turn apathetic eyes away, human trafficking will destroy us all.

I'm pretty sure you've heard the numbers already, but in case you haven't:

I found this article and video this morning, not by chance I'm convinced, about a navy-man-turned-activist who saw trafficking first-hand in the Philippines (my family origin) and then here in the United States. His video was so compelling that I can't help but share it here. Seriously - please watch it. It will be worth the nine and a half minutes of your life.

"You should feel a little outraged ... and upset about this. And that's great, but that's not good enough."

"We all drive demand. We all tolerate sex everywhere."

"It's really time to stop walking on by."

Are you ready? Here's my open door to you, Dear One - my tears running over, my heart in my hand, my world blurring into a vision of what could be - RESCUE.

I'm absolutely, truly, no-doubt-about-it convinced that God's people need to be about the business of freedom. It is for freedom that we have been set free, through His blood on the Cross. And some may say, "Great - I'm freed to be free." But what if that verse means, "You have been set free to spread this freedom and to make freedom for others?" It is for freedom ... Your freedom? Of course. But even more. Even greater things. Humanity's freedom.

Today I'm asking you to take a step and put your money where your faith is, on behalf of the slave next door and the slave around the world, because real rescue is possible today. 

I'll tell you a secret. Every day I wake up and wonder - will I get a text today? Will my team send me a message like this one: 

FREEDOM! 12 yr-old girl rescued early this morning! Her mom and pimp were selling her virginity for $2000 USD. BRAVO Team rescued her and arrested perpetrators.

And after that wonder, I pray. Oh, please God - I want rescue today.

I'm on a team of abolitionists and rescuers, supporting with others like Bravo Team in India, a group of investigators who work undercover with local authorities to Search and Rescue modern-day slaves, and bring them to restoration homes where they can be offered what we all need: freedom. 

Let's put the Word first, and let the love of Christ compel you, before I tell you how this is going to work.

"Tell them to use their money to do good. They should be rich in good works and generous to those in need, always being ready to share with others. By doing this they will be storing up their treasure as a good foundation for the future so that they may experience true life." - 1 Timothy 6:18-19 (NLT)

I want true life for you. The same life I felt rushing through me when I got my S&R package in the mail from The Exodus Road. The same life I felt exploding in me when I read that a slave was rescued, her virginity kept as a choice for her future and hope. The very same life pulsing when I pray for my investigators to have victory over evil whenever I see my stickers and key-chain and magnets with these words:

So here's my audacious goal, but feel free to blow me away, friends. 

I want 25 by my 35th.  

Twenty-five brave partners by the day I turn 35 next month. It's just a few short weeks away, but I believe in God and His miraculous freedom and love for each one. For you, Sweet One. For her. For humanity. Here's how.

Robyn's Challenge:

1. Check out how Search and Rescue works, and decide which team you want to be on. Alpha and Delta are in SE Asia, Bravo is in India, and Charlie is here in the US. (Also, if you want to know how TER manages the money we give, check this out.)
2. Fill out the Donation Form, and use the resources God has blessed you with to fund rescue and freedom with The Exodus Road. For $35 a month (less than the cost of a new pair of jeans), you can hire a team of investigators and be a part of giving freedom to women and children trapped in the clutches of their traffickers. These people bust brothels, pedophiles, and trafficking rings, and bring justice. For Real. Please don't forget! Under the portion where it says "Additional information/Select Operating Project" PLEASE type a bird in the box. This is my code for my project -25 by my 35th.  For real - rescue is what I want for my birthday. Twenty-five of my readers and friends - on board to change the world. Listen - if by next November you aren't addicted to sharing freedom in this way, by all means opt out. I'm asking you to try it for just a year, though. I think it's worth it. For real.
3. Please don't skip this part! Drop your name in the comments below, and tell me why you decided to be a part of bringing freedom to slaves. I'm going to be drawing a number (1-25 of the first readers who partner with me) out of a hat for a giveaway of Laura Parker's book, The Exodus Road, as well as a hand-made journal and a stack of my greeting cards. This is just an extra incentive and thank-you to my amazing readers who make this nest a place of God's joy. I'll contact you after my birthday to let you know you won, and get your mailing address. 
4. Like and share this post on Facebook/retweet on Twitter/share with your social network via email, because I'll bet your friends care about slaves too. (There are some handy buttons for you right down there, next to the little pencil.)

"If we are dying of thirst, passively reading books about water quenches little; the only way to quench the parched mouth is to close the book and dip the hand into water and bring it to the lips. If we thirst, we'll have to drink." - Ann Voskamp

Our world is thirsting for freedom. Humanity pants for justice. Let us partake of the Fountain, and then be the vessel that quenches freedom's thirst. 

fighting back ... with love

Join me over the next few weeks for the story of Anna, which isn't a true story, but it might as well be:

At thirteen, Anna loved movies, magazines, and chocolate, though she rarely got any of those.  Her family was so poor that her small home in St. Petersburg rarely saw more than three to four real meals in a week.  Anna often went without breakfast, giving her bread and milk to her feeble grandmother or one of her younger siblings as she headed out the door for work in a local bakery.  She had been attending school, but was forced to make the decision to work and eat instead of learning.  It was a difficult choice, but the meager wages at least gave them enough for some bread, and her brother and two sisters could stay in school that way.  Anna's mother worked at night, and though she never told Anna what she did or where she went, Anna guessed she must have been either selling herself or selling drugs.  She was too afraid to ask and too ashamed to know.  

One morning she saw a sign in the bakery window about a nanny job in America that paid $1000 per month.  Hoping against hope, Anna called the number and agreed to meet the voice on the the other end of the line two days later with her passport and a small bag of clothes.  After a tearful, reassuring good-bye with her mother, siblings, and grandmother, Anna promised to send home all the money she could as soon as possible so her family could move out of the ghetto-like conditions into a better life.

As she boarded the bus with the man, who smiled kindly and examined her papers, Anna noticed four other girls who were a little older than her, all with the same hopeful looks on their faces that must have been on Anna's as well. With the promise of money, adventure, and opportunity filling their thoughts, they settled into their seats quietly.

It wasn't until hours later when they crossed the border of China and still hadn't been given any food that Anna began to worry.  As she asked when they would eat and where they would be boarding an airplane, her escort suddenly turned on all of them.  "Shut up," he yelled.  "When you get to where you're going, I'll tell you what comes next.  Didn't you bring anything to eat?"

Frightened into silence, Anna looked around at the others, who were just as confused and scared.  ...

[join me for part 2 next week ...]


Awareness [think, pray, act]:

• In the United States, the number of trafficking victims is roughly equivalent to the number of murders each year, according to “The Slave Next Door” by Kevin Bales. And while 90 percent of murder cases are solved, only 1 percent of trafficking cases ever reach prosecution.
• Did you know that 4 Asian countries depend on the sex industry for 2% to as high as 14% of their economies? UNICEF reports that out of the 2.5 million people trafficked in the world it is estimated that 22 – 50 percent of them are children. Of those trafficked some studies show that most trafficked underage women are used in the sex industry. Much of that activity happens in SE Asia. (sources: International Labor Organization, UNICEF, UNODC – global report on trafficking in persons in 2012)  Read More
• The human trafficking industry is estimated at $32 billion per year 

In the 1860's, they fought for emancipation. In the 1960's they fought for civil rights.  Today we fight still - for the same things.  This time the people group is not determined by the color of skin, but by the vulnerability of age and gender.  

In the words of Martin Luther King, Jr. :

“Everybody can be great...because anybody can serve. You don't have to have a college degree to serve. You don't have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. You only need a heart full of grace. A soul generated by love.” 

“There comes a time when one must take a position that is neither safe, nor politic, nor popular, but he must take it because conscience tells him it is right.” 

“There comes a time when silence is betrayal.”

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.” 

What ... can ... we... do...?

"Isn’t this the fast I [God] choose:
    releasing wicked restraints, untying the ropes of a yoke,
    setting free the mistreated,
    and breaking every yoke?
Isn’t it sharing your bread with the hungry    and bringing the homeless poor into your house,
    covering the naked when you see them,
    and not hiding from your own family?" -Isaiah 58:6-7 (CEB)

1. We can pray 
2. We can speak up
3. We can give and give and give
4. We can go (or short-term like my Guy and 7 other friends leaving tomorrow for a mission in India - won't you pray with me for their safety, and that the Holy Spirit will move powerfully to rescue these girls for eternity of freedom?)
5. We can become a billboard for change

"He lifted me out of the pit of death,
    out of the mud and filth,
    and set my feet on solid rock.
        He steadied my legs." -Psalm 40:2

Lord, we pray for justice, like only You can bring.  It will take miracles to rescue these slaves and set them free, but You are in the business of doing miracles.  This is why we talk to You about human trafficking.  We plead with You to change our world.  We refuse silence.  We refuse to look the other way.  We choose You and Your plan of freedom.  Use us, Father as Your mouthpiece, Your tender hands, and Your Gospel-shod feet.

Click below to find out how you can get involved too: